I learned this lesson last week when Rory, surrounded by cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents, had a bad fall. I was a measly few inches away. We'd just sped around the pool in an imaginary speedboat and in just a few seconds after docking at the pool steps he managed to slip and slice a gash in his chin that felt to me like the parting of the Red Sea. I immediately picked him up and rushed to get a towel. His screams made his gash open and close. Was it just me or could I see into the depths of his soul?
Being Orlando, the hospital was close by. Everything is. He was rushed in, Swaddled and held down. 5 stitches sewn into his chin and it was done. (In my delusional parent panic state, it all seemed much longer.) He even was given an ultra sugary Popsicle, which I generally wouldn't allow him to eat. But considering the circumstances, I wanted to ask for two.
After everything was said and done and we were trying to relax in the suite I continued to worry about the gash, that my poor baby had already maimed himself majorly before he was even two. That he may fall pull the stitches out or continue to hurt himself. Am I a hypochondriac? Do I not trust God enough? My mother would tell me I need anxiety pills but it's just so horrible when it's your little baby and he's hurting. Most people that know Rory tell me I might as well get used to it. He's a rough little kid. He sports a new bruise on his head weekly. This is just the beginning. Someone even mentioned looking into Aflac. It may pay for itself. :) Let's pray that Rory will just figure out how to be rough safely. We don't want to take anything away from his personality but we don't want to spend every week in the Emergency Room either. Do you hear that Rory? Safe is the key word! I split my chin open similarly when I was 7. I know it's part of life but I just thought that maybe he'd have a few years before he started maiming himself.
All things considered Rory did fantastic the rest of the little vacation and didn't complain once. He never touched his stitches, didn't even act like anything was different. He's probably the most amazing kid I've ever known. I love his spirit and attitude.
I can imagine someone out there rolling their eyes saying I'm ridiculous. And maybe I am. Maybe that's what first time parents do. And yes I know that having your baby look like a Frankenstein for a few weeks is nothing compared to all the kids that are dying every day in Africa, or are suffering with a terminal illness. My baby is healthy and I thank God every day for that. It's just scary when you realize that no matter what you do or how careful you are that bad things are still going to happen. You just have to trust.
Ironically on our drive home from the suite, there was a major storm brewing but afterwards there was the most beautiful rainbow coming out of the gray clouds. I'd never seen one so beautiful with every color so wide and visible. In my thoughts, the words "I'll protect Rory" were as clear as any other thought I'd had all day. It was amazing and inspirational. I love how God's always right there. He immediately gave me the opportunity to have faith and trust when just four days later Rory fell down at home onto his chin re-splitting it, I hated that. I really did. I hate that there is pain out there, I hate that my precious little man has to endure any of it. But with out pain or scars, What is there? Constant Utopia? No reason ever to trust? God has plans for Rory. He's going to protect him. I'll remember that the next time he gets hurt. I'll probably still freak out, but I'll remember.