Monday, January 27, 2014

Attention Wal-Mart Shoppers- Cute Baby on Aisle 9

  I've discovered quite an intriguing fact in the past 5 months.  Babies are human-nip!  Having a baby in tow makes you more popular.  It allows almost everyone around you to smile and say "Did you see that baby's cheeks?" as they pass by.   It gives anyone the permission to walk up to you and start having a conversation about diapers, baby food, or poop.  Great friends become even more amazing as they run towards at a full sprint the moment you walk into a room and say things like "I'm going to steal your child!"  or "I can hold him for you if he gets heavy.. wow he sure looks heavy."

The thing I wasn't quite expecting I guess were the random people in Wal-Mart to be just as intrigued....

"Do you need spam?" Kim asks.
"Umm, you actually brought spam up in a conversation?  I'm impressed," I say. 
"Well, I know you like it.  I do try to be a good wife," Kim says as she stares down at Rory who is strapped to her front in the baby carrier.  "Ooh!  I love you!"
  As I look down the aisle I see an older couple walking our way.  I can tell by the way the woman's eyes lock on Rory, she's enamored. 
  "Oh my goodness!" she says with a skip in her step, as she rushes towards us.  "He is just so precious."
  The woman grabs Rory's cheeks like a fly on cheesecake and continues to give him accolade after accolade. 
  "Thank you," Kim says. 
  "Herbert!" The woman yells down the aisle, "Come over here and look at this baby!  He has red hair!  His cheeks are cute!  Herbert!  Come look at him!"
  Herbert makes his way over and looks at Rory for two seconds and says "Cute." 
  "Ohhhh," the lady coos, "You are all strapped in that contraption aren't you?"
  "Yes," Kim says.  "He likes to look around but also be close to mommy."
   "Well," the lady says eyes only on Rory, "We didn't have things like that in my day, and if I could figure out how to get you out of there I would take you home with me.  I sure would Herbert!"
  "Yes, yes!  I know you would Mildred!" 
  "I just love him!" Mildred says kissing Rory's plumps cheeks, "You are so blessed."
  "We know it!" I say. 

  "I see you have Pampers!" a lady one aisle over  says. 
  "Oh?" I say.  "Yeah, they have worked best for us." 
  "I just read something about Pampers and chemical burns.  Just watch for them," the woman says.
  "Oh, well thank you!  We've been using them since he's been born and we haven't had a problem."
  "Just be careful!  We use Luv's.  They are the best for us!" 
  "Maybe we'll try them!" Kim says.
  "You're baby is just so cute!  I think he could be a Gerber baby!"
  "Oh well thanks!" I say.


   While we wait for Gertie to scan our items at the register, Rory strikes up a staring contest with an older Hispanic couple behind us.  They stare and smile and make faces at Rory while speaking in Spanish.  He starts laughing and smiling. 
  "Can I touch your baby?" the older gentlemen asks Kim.
  She nods her head and the man playfully jiggles Rory's arm and makes more faces.  "He is so good."
  "Thank you!" Kim says simultaneously with Gertie who coughs into her hand and continues touching all of our groceries.  (Of course , I would notice this.  All Kim was thinking was how surprised she was that the man was so intrigued with Rory.)

  So parents?  Is this an oddity or does this happen all the time?  Do random people all over just seek you out to and try to touch your baby?

comic by bitstrips

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